Are you where you want to be, doing what you want to do? In other words, are you content with your life? Do you feel fulfilled and fully present? Are you the hero of your own life?
Granted you may be tired, exhausted even, but when you go to sleep at night are you able to congratulate yourself on a day well spent, at least most of the time? Sometimes? Or do you fall asleep planning a new venture, or thinking about an ambiguous point in your future when you will…well, maybe you aren’t quite sure, but something will be different.
Or maybe you are sure. Maybe you know exactly what you want to do instead of what you are doing, and you fully plan to – someday. Or perhaps you feel that you are exactly where you are meant to be, moving along your path, but quaking in the boots you wear as you walk along.
The angels whisper to us, they provide us with inspiration, passion even, to help us find our path, and synchronicities to assist us with staying on it while we move forward in our lives. The ego, on the other hand fights for control. It prefers that we move away from the path that leads us back to ourselves and away from ego, away from its control.
Here are a few of the tactics that ego uses to control your process:
The ego preys on your sense of inadequacy and uses self-deprecation to further its agenda. It is masterful at knowing your weak points and using them as gaps to flow into your psyche in order to remind you that you are not smart enough to go back to school, or that you don’t have the financial wherewithal to start that business, or that public speaking is terrifying.
The ego voice engages you in self-talk that is typically negative in nature. It tells you that you don’t have a “math brain”, so there is no way you could master the accounting classes necessary to successfully run a small business; that in order to compete for that position you’d have to first lose thirty pounds, at least; that you’re not an artist, so taking a painting class it just too frightening. The ego-voice is commonly confused with that of your own voice.
Another way ego sabotages you is by using the S-word against you. SELFISH! That is, your ego voice will not only tell you that you are being selfish, but it will do its best to convince you. Most of us were taught as children that selfishness is not an admirable trait, which is true. But somewhere along the way the line between self-care and/or personal growth, and selfishness became blurred. Most of us (especially women) believe that self-focus and taking care of oneself is synonymous with “selfishness”. Your ego-voice will often be only the first of several voices to let you know that you are being selfish. This occurs in anticipation of being asked by those you are the closest to, “What about me?” “What about the kids, (your job,) (the mortgage)?” Because you know you will be, right? These are the questions you ask yourself before anyone else does. Only it’s not you asking, it’s ego.
Following the initial assault of the ego-voice, you have the terrain of the egos of others to navigate. The opinion of selfishness, born of the fear and insecurity of the other, is frequently posited without pretense and with much emotion as in, “You can’t be serious. You’re being so selfish!” Or, “You’re only thinking of yourself!” AND THEN, “What about…” Ego loves that. Now it can say, “Told you so.”
A third mechanism is guilt. Guilt has got to be one of the most motivating (read paralyzing) of all of the emotions we experience, and ego counts on that. Growth creates change. It’s inevitable. (Imagine a comic strip; one person speaking to another saying, “I just wish change didn’t have to be so different.” Not funny perhaps, but so true.) When your personal growth bumps into the life of another person something in that person’s life changes and when that change is met with resistance guilt is the outcome. Resistance can take many forms – anger, sadness, jealousy to name a few, but at its most basic level resistance is fear. And fear is the voice of ego. It’s a circle. It’s a trap, an ego trap.
So how do you find your path, or continue to move forward in your life? How do you avoid being sabotaged by that ever-ready ego? How do you know the ego voice from that of your own?
- You take the time to practice quieting the chattering voice in your head in order to hear the softer, quieter voice of your heart. Your angels speak from your heart, not your head.
- You take the time to feel your emotions. Ego-based emotions are fear-based and destructive. Angel whispers are compelling, inspiring, light-hearted. They lift you up and carry you forward.
- You silence negative self-talk and walk away from negative input from others.
- You listen for angel whispers and watch for the synchronicities that will lead you to, or propel you forward on your path.
How does your ego-voice influence your growth?